We have had whales off Cornwall, it can only be days before we have the shark scare stories in Skeggy and then, of course, we have had the Kamikaze dive-bombing seagulls nicking your fish and chips.
All great knockabout fun but the silly season has taken a new turn with the new comedy double act at the Edinburgh Fringe of Comrade Corbyn and John McDonnell. McDonnell declared that they will have a coup and take over running the UK if Boris Johnson dares to take us out of the EU after a vote of no confidence or during a General Election campaign.
Please pass me the needle and thread, my sides are splitting!
I thought the Labour double act was Abbot and Costello with her maths skills and the idea that this woman could be Home Secretary but no, the joker has been played and it’s certainly Corbyn and McDonnell, the Non-chuckle Brothers of the left or perhaps the Dumb and Dumber of British Politics.
McDonnell’s stand-up routine at the fringe went like this, if Boris Johnson lost a vote of confidence in the House Of Muppets and then decided to go to the country instead of stepping down, he would act. Marxist McDonnell’s punchline was that, I would be sending Jeremy Corbyn in a cab to Buckingham Palace to say: “We’re taking over”.
It’s a cracker, isn’t it? Because in one sentence he reveals who is really in charge of the Labour party and it clearly isn’t Corbyn, and he also tells you what life would be like under the Labour jackboot.
How he has the temerity, along with other remainers like Chuka (which party am I in today) Umunna to talk about Boris defying Parliament when these self-servers have defied us, the British public of our Brexit is beyond belief.
The people spoke and have been ignored by 650 odd, in every sense of the word, muppets in Parliament and their mates in the media.
Boris at last, is trying to deliver what we democratically voted for and he has the EU on the run and people are loving it. It looks like the Clown Prince of British politics is winning the hearts and minds of the British public in the silly season.
Just look at the polls, people actually believe in Boris.
Of course, Her Majesty will not be dragged into this nonsense and I don’t think Corbyn would even get through the front gates of the Palace. He will surely get the cliched bouncers response, “sorry mate, your name isn’t on the list!”
The monarch is not going to go against the wishes of the people, is she?
But the MSM are having a seagull feeding frenzy on this non-story actually trying to convince us it could happen and that perhaps we need a Government of National unity. Some buffoon even suggested that ex Green Leader Caroline Lucas should be the PM? Silly season you ask?
Not to be outdone by his obvious puppet master, Comrade Corbyn has now entered the comedy routine by writing a letter to the cabinet secretary Mark Sedwell.
This is the political equivalent of Ernie Wise producing “a play wot I wrote” but less funny. Comic Corbyn writes that such a move by Boris would be an "anti-democratic abuse of power".
He has the temerity to say this with the most deadpan face since Les Dawson, but it is no laughing matter.
You have to ask what has the last three miserable years and the fence-sitting of Corbyn on the EU been?
What about the fact that he has betrayed thousands of his Labour votes in the north who voted leave.
What about the fact that his manifesto is not worth the paper it was written on.
What about the fact that article 50 implicitly states if a deal wasn’t reached by March 31 we leave on WTO terms.
Corbyn like the rest of the self-serving pigs in the swamp have conveniently forgotten all of this.
However, I am sure the electorate haven’t forgotten! They will deliver the savage put down and punchline in ballot boxes the length and breadth of this land very, very soon.
Meanwhile, in the spirit of the silly season, the BBC have gone into full Lord Haw Haw mode and are broadcasting a continuous loop of Operation Fear stories.
The best one so far being the ridiculous non-story about 45 thousand dairy cows having to be slaughtered in Northern Ireland if we leave on a no-deal.
This was broadcast on BBC Newsnight, so I guess hardly anyone would have seen it but basically it consisted of a young female “reporter” breathlessly telling Emma Barnet that “sources” had told her that the Northern Ireland Dairy Industry would be decimated IF (if being the operative word) we left on a so-called no-deal.
She went on and on about the ‘poor moo-cows’ and even had a filmed package of the ‘doomed beasts’ accompanied by doom-laden piano music!
She was talking on the cows’ behalf like a superannuated-on speed Johnny Morris from Animal Magic.
It was the most unintentionally funny piece of news I have seen in ages.
However, at the end of the interview, Barnett asked if her report would be dismissed by Leavers as part of Operation Fear. She snorted a dismissive reply signifying that of course, it would be!
However then, in almost the same breath she actually said yes, of course, this doomsday scenario for Daisy the cow and 45 thousand others was speculation!
Not once did she name a “source” in the time she was given to spout her ill-informed, poorly researched and clearly biased report.
The Ulster Farmers Union President, Ivor Ferguson, rubbished her report within hours saying, the “notion of culling 45,000 cows was scare tactics” and that the “figure was plucked out of the air.”
Is this what passes for reporting and journalism on our state-funded Broadcaster?
Are the BBC so desperate for social media clicks that they have resorted to the basest clickbait headlines?
Was this young woman competing for Emily Maitlis’ crown of Lady Haw Haw of the Brexit Broadcasting Corporation?
Just a day earlier, Emily had been comprehensively schooled by Lord Lamont who told her after a tirade from her of cliched, anti-Brexit operation fear soundbites that she was exaggerating to which Emily just shouted over him?
Is this really the flagship impartial news programme it pretends to be? Is this the best the BBC can offer?
After watching these two interviews, I can’t be the only one to think that the only bloody cull we need is a cull of these lefty remainers, biased presenters, reporters and producers, can I?
In fact, let’s cut out the middle man and lets just kill off the BBC and their repressive and regressive licence fee. This bias is now beyond a joke.
Whilst we are culling the Biased BBC we also need to cull the self-serving pigs of Westminster and the way to do this is in every humane way by having a General election as soon as possible. Let the people decide who “lives and dies” by what should be the most powerful weapon in the world one woman one vote and a little thing called democracy.
Let the cull begin.
The views and opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Sputnik.
