07:00 GMT09 August 2020
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    It’s been a year since the “Russian hackers” meme, launched by Hillary Clinton’s campaign and readily embraced by Washington-friendly media everywhere, went viral in 2016.

    Igor Gashkov (RIA Novosti). However, with the election period in the West now winding down, the accusations about Moscow’s alleged meddling are getting more and more absurd.

    Estonia: “Russian Hackers” Downloading Hip-Hop on Smartphones

    Earlier this month, the cold-blooded hysteria about the much-feared “Russian hackers” got a new twist also in the Baltic countries and Poland, which now host NATO reinforcements.

    According to The Wall Street Journal, some mysterious cyber goons had used a mobile telephone aerial somewhere in Russia to hack into the smartphones of NATO soldiers and erase their personal data.

    Sounds like another load of bulls**t, but the no-nonsense NATO command took it very seriously and NATO warriors are now allowed to go online exclusively via special hotspots.

    And, as if this was not enough, they have been ordered to surrender their mobile phones, and those who don’t, are forced to jump into water to prove they have no incriminating electronic devices hidden in their underwear.

    Earlier this year one NATO soldier who, defying his commanders’ ban, still used his smartphone discovered on it some unusual files, which turned out to be Hip-Hop music.

    Who did that? Russian hackers, that’s who! God only knows why though. In the meantime, some important programs allegedly started disappearing from the soldier’s gadget.

    In Britney’s Dark Recesses

    With the political buzz now cooling down, all the talk about “Russian hackers” has been moving into the realm of everyday life. This past summer, Slovakian cybersecurity experts discovered “Russian hackers” messing with the Instagram account of none other than Britney Spears.

    Failing to hack the pop diva’s webpage, they avenged themselves by peppering her photographs with a flurry of malware-packed comments. Why on earth they would want to do this remains a mystery only the most vigilant defenders of the Western faith may know.

     "Russian Hackers” Muscle Into Wolf Creek

    In another non-political scandal of late, some anonymous US officials told Bloomberg that some imaginary Russian hackers had attacked the internet servers of the Wolf Creek nuclear power station in Burlington, Kansas.

    The unnamed sources said that the Russians did not have in mind undermining US security. All they apparently wanted was to get access to corporate databases and business projects.

    What a relief! The “Russian cyberattack” was nothing more than just industrial espionage, nothing more.

    Light at the End of the Hotel

    In August, security firm FireEye rang alarm bells about some shadowy cyber-spying group with suspected links to Russian military intelligence having been probably behind a campaign targeting hotel guests in eight mostly European countries and one in the Middle East.

    The espionage group allegedly sought to steal password credentials from Western government officials and businessmen  using hotel Wi-Fi networks, in order to infect their organizational networks back home.

    No mention of the hotels, which had allegedly been targeted by ill-intentioned Russian eavesdroppers, was made though.

    “Russian Hackers” Messing With Their Own Football World Cup 

    The customary rumors about “Russian  hackers” hit a particularly mundane note after the English Football Association issued a warning to its national squad that if they happen to make it to next year’s championship in Russia, they should avoid using Wi-Fi in order not to fall prey to “Russian hackers.”

    The British seem to believe that the proverbial “Russian hackers” have moved away from politics and turned into small-time zanies going after unsuspecting middle class folks.


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    2018 World Cup, hotels, nuclear power station, eavesdropping, funny stories, Russian hackers, FireEye, NATO, Britney Spears, World
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