It all started with Philly police’s tweet ahead of the NFC final between the Philadelphia Eagles and the Minnesota Vikings in Minneapolis a couple of weeks ago.
Now comes the time in the night where we must warn everyone about the dangers of Saturated Fats. Cheers for #Foles! Jeers for #Poles! It's a long way down, baby. Celebrate responsibly! pic.twitter.com/mES5MpPTY4
— Philadelphia Police (@PhillyPolice) January 22, 2018
Climbing signs, streetlights and other public poles to celebrate a home team victory is a thing in the City of Brotherly Love, but the police don't look kindly on it; hence the shortening. But their idea didn’t really work, as the Eagles faithful treated the slick cylinders as just a fun challenge following the Birds’ dismantling of the Vikes.
So the thoughtful folks at Pornhub came up with an awesome alternative: use a whopping 110 gallons of their lubricant instead.
.@PhillyPolice heard that you may be looking for an alternative to @Crisco for greasing up the poles this weekend — can we interest you in a few barrels of Pornhub lube? pic.twitter.com/VvK9UDci8k
— Pornhub ARIA (@Pornhub) January 31, 2018
The cops certainly appeared to have appreciated the joke.
— Philadelphia Police (@PhillyPolice) January 31, 2018
Some of the local fans are clearly familiar with the product.
THIS STUFF AINT NO JOKE!!! I used some for my kids slip and slide, and he ended up sliding into the neighbors yard!
— Fried Chicken Nugget (@McCartney_NFL) January 31, 2018
Philadelphia Inquirer reporter Stephania Farr added a Pornhub quote lost in the shuffle.
More on the 'barrels of lube' Pornhub has offered to Philly. Alas, this quote was cut: “We figured if we are able to successfully ‘grease the poles’ of thousands of Pornhub fans across the globe, why not help out the good people of Philly!” https://t.co/to3cCNScRV
— Stephanie Farr (@FarFarrAway) January 31, 2018
Either way, the chances of Philly residents celebrating a Super Bowl win are slim to none: their guys are facing the greatest dynasty in history on the NFL, the mighty New England Patriots, headed by the coach-quarterback duo of Bill Belichik and Tom Brady. The big game is coming up this Sunday night.
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