How the Left Stole Christmas

In the early morning of this Wednesday, a 15-meter-tall All-American Christmas tree, decked with lights and decorations outside the Fox News headquarters in midtown Manhattan, NYC, was set on fire.

According to the police, the suspect acted alone and the incident did not appear to be intentional or politically motivated. Charges are pending against him, and he reportedly was encountered by NYPD officers for exposing himself outside the ongoing highly publicized trial of Ghislaine Maxwell in the city about a week prior to the fire.

Well, that gives some insight as to the man's mental state, right? Especially given that he confessed on Thursday that he has been "thinking about lighting the tree on fire all day long."

Fox News, to which the original tree cost dearly, as did the new one that was installed on Thursday, took the tragedy rather personally, first mocking the unfortunate headline of their colleagues from the New York Times of the tree "catching" on fire.

The channel's host Tucker Carlson called the arson of the tree "an attack on Christianity" and urged Attorney General Merrick Garland to investigate the incident as a federal hate crime. The anchor also added that the DOJ "can tell you precisely how many Korans were burned last year in the United States, but they don’t keep track of Christmas trees. Why is that? Well, because they could care less."

We can only hope that the arsonist is not a member of the Grinch's terrorist organization, whose goal was to steal Christmas out of hatred for conifers in America.